Not sure what Rip City even means...

Having been in Portland a month shy of two years, I guess it's still a bit of a stretch to claim to be a Trailblazers fan. You're probably questioning why would I even consider such a thing in the first place. Well, I can't really explain it, but this team has captured my heart since we first began to lay down roots in the Stumples. It's not just a factor of location, as I wasn't too far from the Golden State Warriors when I lived in Northern Cali and I never attended a single game. No, the major contributing factor is that this team makes me laugh...they're awkward, accident prone, inexperienced, foul-happy (at all the wrong times), defenseless, and seem to be sleeping a good deal of the time. But they have Sergio Rodriguez, nicknamed Spanish Chocolate for reasons that escape me (he's from Spain, but is a white dude)...he isn't particularly good, but hustles like he's running from a hungry Danny Devito in a wig holding two giant forks. This kid is Cah-razy. He seriously plays like he's the only one on the court, passing outrageously to invisible amigos, shooting (and missing) like the devil is breathing down his neck, and dribbling like a red breasted-squirrel on nine sheets of acid. He's seriously funny as shit...and tonight he actually did okay, hooking the team up with a handfull of points and 11 assists. Aside from Zach Randolph (affectionately nicknamed Z-Bo, which to me conjures images of a hillbilly rapist from the Ozarks) scoring over 30 points, the team never really woke up from their little group nap in the locker room before the game...Martell Webster did better than he has all season, but I expect him to play like that...he's got the skills, just doesn't have the confidence to use them on any consistent basis. Anyway, the team lost for the their thirtieth time (at least it feels like it) in a row, and Kes and I left the Rose Garden more than a little saddened. For fuck's sake guys, score 100 points next time if you're planning on losing the game, so the fans can walk away with a goddamn Chalupa (an actual promotion paid for by Taco Bell), if not an actual win. Oh well, they're going through obvious growing/learning pains...but mark my words, this team will be hot in another three years, if not before. It's just going to be a reeeaaall long season...at least I'll get a few chuckles from Sergio for the admission price.