Homebwoyn Hoagies

Okay, so I've been in a bit of a writer's funk these last few weeks. I'm sure it mostly had to do with my last post getting deleted as I was polishing up the final draft...it was a wonderfully funny telling of my trip to the Star Wars exhibit at the Oregon Museum of Science and Industry (OMSI) that included death threats made on my behalf towards a group of Girl Scouts, building a magnetic levitation vehicle, drooling over the original props and costumes from all six films (Luke's lightsaber, C3-P0 & R2D2 cold chillin'fucking Darth Vader...), creating a virtual blow-up doll, and riding a hovercraft. Alas, it was apparently not meant for your eyes. Too brilliant, I suppose.

A few nuggeteers:

-I checked out the Stark Vacuum Cleaner Museum on NE Couch, a block away from my office...I'd passed it on several dozen previous occasions on my way to pick up my weekly copy of the Portland Tribune (one of our three free city papers), but never actually thought to go inside. Well, let's just say it was as exciting and as deeply interesting as it sounds. The only item that latched onto my memory (a difficult task these days) was a tricked-out cleaner with spoilers, racing flames, and exhaust pipes...quick somebody call up Pimp My Vacuum, they need to hire this guy.

-Our local director Gus Van Sant set up shop a few weeks back at the legendary Burnside Skatepark, located down below my office building...he's filming his latest movie titled Paranoid Park. I got to hang out for a few hours (getting paid at work at the same time, of course...I was out "visiting a client.") on the set, watching them set up shots, film for two seconds, reset the scene, shoot another few frames, repeat ad naseum. It was all a bit less glamorous than I would have imagined, though Gus seemed like a nice guy. I ended up sending several of my clients his way for extras, which felt pretty good...though, apparently extras only get paid minimum wage (maybe a bit more if they get to go home early), so my kids didn't thank me too much. This was the second time I've seen Gus Van Sant out and about in Portland, the first being at the kick-off event for the Time Based Art festival in Pioneer Courthouse Square, where 30 electric guitarists performed a "choose-your-own-adventure"-like symphony.

-I spent a week traveling with a Bedouin family in Saudi Arabia...it was a sublime experience. We laughed, we cried, we talked about Gypsy catching. Keep your eyes peeled for a full account at my other blog http://www.oldhatesworking.blogspot.com